Friday, April 26, 2013

How Will Your Parents React If You Text Them Pretending To Be A Drug Dealer?

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What Will Your Parents React If Text Them Pretending To Be A Drug Dealer?
This is very hilarious. Nathan Fielder, star and creator of one of the funniest shows on television, Comedy Central's Nathan for You, asked his Twitter followers to text their parents saying they had weed for sale. And the results are as good and as painful as you'd imagine. 

I wonder how a Nigerian parent would've reacted, or to be precise how a Warri parent would have reacted lol!
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What Will Your Parents React If Text Them Pretending To Be A Drug Dealer?
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What Will Your Parents React If Text Them Pretending To Be A Drug Dealer?
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What Will Your Parents React If Text Them Pretending To Be A Drug Dealer?
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What Will Your Parents React If Text Them Pretending To Be A Drug Dealer?
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What Will Your Parents React If Text Them Pretending To Be A Drug Dealer?
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What Will Your Parents React If Text Them Pretending To Be A Drug Dealer?

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What Will Your Parents React If Text Them Pretending To Be A Drug Dealer?

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What Will Your Parents React If Text Them Pretending To Be A Drug Dealer?

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What Will Your Parents React If Text Them Pretending To Be A Drug Dealer?
Via: @carraa_

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What Will Your Parents React If Text Them Pretending To Be A Drug Dealer?
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What Will Your Parents React If Text Them Pretending To Be A Drug Dealer?

Now which was your favourite response from the parent?

Irate Policeman Stripped Naked Protesting Unpaid Salary

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Irate Policeman Stripped Naked Protesting Unpaid Salary

Frustration is a terrible path you don’t want to thread, it can drive you insane. A police constable, Leke Obaba, on Thursday evening stripped himself naked at the Lagos State Police Command Headquarters, Ikeja, Lagos State, southwest Nigeria, to protest over his unpaid salary.

The police officer, who told newsmen that he joined the police force in 2003, complained that he had not been given his salary since he started working with the force.

“You won’t believe that I have no access to my account since I was demobilised from the Mobile Police Force, MOPOL, 53 Akwa Ibom State. For over 11 years I have worked I was not paid any salary. I was later transferred from Kaduna Command to Lagos last year. Though when I was in Kaduna I was taken to a psychiatric hospital, I have wife and children, how do I feed them?”

When contacted, the Provost Marshal of the Command said there was nothing he could do about it.
It was also gathered that the constable had earlier been detained but later freed so that he will not disturb suspects in the cell.

A police source at the command said the constable was transferred to Lagos last year, but another police source was skeptical about the constable, saying that he has not seen him before and that he poses a danger to other officers at the command because of his unruly behaviour.

“I’m seeing this man for the first time in my life. If they eventually give him a gun, I hope he will not kill the whole people at the command,” a police officer said.

When contacted the Lagos Command Police Public Relations Officer,a Deputy Superintendent of Police Mrs.Ngozi Braide did not pick her call.

Mean Church Worshipper Gives Used Condom As Offering In Church

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Mean Church Worshipper Gives Used Condom As Offering In Church
To most Christians, the offering time is, indeed, a time of immense financial blessing. But recently, the offering time turned into a moment of hot curses in a Lagos church when an already used condom, dripping with semen, was discovered inside the offering box after the Sunday service.

It was like a weird dream, according to the former Chairman, Pentecostal Fellowship of Nigeria (PFN), Ogba Zone, Prophet Tobi Okonkwo, who witnessed the incident. The cleric said he couldn’t believe his eyes when a discarded condom, with stains, was discovered in an envelope in the offertory box of his former church.

When Pope Paul VI warned on June 29, 1972 that the smoke of Satan had entered the church, not many Christians took the warning seriously.

With this recent incident, Okonkwo admitted that the agents of darkness had infiltrated the churches in large numbers and now occupy high-ranking positions in the gathering of God’s children, where they wreak untold havoc on the unwary flock.

Okonkwo, who is also the General Overseer of Living Word Prayer Assembly, Agege, Lagos, wept over man’s ingratitude to God during a recent monthly thanksgiving programme of the church, tagged Manna from Heaven.

Although the service was a joyful moment where the shepherd distributes food items and other gifts to his flock, his startling revelation brought a hush of silence on the congregation.

His words pierced the hearts of the worshippers, as he explained how man had become ungrateful to divine benevolence. His several instances of the atrocities committed in hallowed places pointed to the fact that messengers from hell now walked about freely in hallowed places. “It is really bad.

It has got to a point where some people come to the church to mock God. They are anti-Christ but they still go to church. You could imagine how somebody came to the church and decided to give a used condom in an envelope to God.

You can see how wicked man has become,” he said. Okonkwo said the giver of the abominable gift refused to confess his crime, even when the entire church rained curses profusely on whosoever was responsible.

He said, “A curse was laid on the person. Even before the people laid the curse, God had already seen the abomination committed in his house by someone, who pretended he came to the church to worship God.”

The former PFN leader warned other members of the church of the reality of the anti-Christ, whose reign would usher ungodliness in the world. He lamented that prosperity message has taken over the pulpit at the neglect of the gospel of repentance, which had enslaved many hearts in pleasure and love of the world.

According to him, most Christians hunger for sermons that promise easy wealth, while rejecting teachings that encourage chastity, discipline, endurance and faithfulness.

“The style of the anti-Christ is to mock Jesus. Many Christians today are crucifying Christ a second time. It’s really sad and unfortunate,” he said. The cleric decried the approval of same sex marriage by different countries, describing the constitutional recognition accorded to such couples as an indication of the reign of anti-Christ in the world.

Rather than milk his members dry, Okonkwo said he introduced a programme, Manna from Heaven, to feed the flock of Christ with the little he could afford. He said the programme involved sharing of bags of rice, noodles and other foodstuff on equal measures to all the members to inculcate in them the love for sharing and concern for their suffering neighbour.

Okonkwo also berated some pastors who, according to him, start Christian ministries and involve themselves in dubious things all in a bid to acquire wealth and fame. He said such ones worship money as their god. “For them to get money, they end up preaching prosperity.

Salvation messages are not often on their lips. The church is not supposed to be a business but most people have turned it into a business.

It is quite unfortunate,” he said. Aside the sacrileges committed in churches, Okonkwo, who had earlier predicted the emergence of Jonathan as President during the ailing days of late President Umaru Musa Yar’Adua, also frowned at the various scandals rocking political offices and other sectors of the economy.

He said most Nigerians have lost the sense of sanity, citing the many cases of corruption in the country. According to him, no day passes without the disclosure of one fresh set of financial scandal or the other.

He lamented that the financial blood of the country was being drained by some thieving elite with no interest of the masses at heart. Although Okonkwo foreclosed the chances of possible disintegration of the country, he warned corrupt leaders to repent or face the wrath of heaven.

According to him, only selfless leaders would bring the nation back from the brink of monumental crisis and repair the ruins caused by corruption and bad leadership in the country.

ANSARU Reveals Why They Take Foreign Hostages

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ANSARU Reveals Why They Take Foreign Hostages 
For those that dont know, Ansaru, is a breakaway militant group from Boko Haram. They were responsible for kidnapping seven foreign construction workers in Bauch recently. Ansaru has explained why the group abduct foreign hostages, saying it was meant to send a message to the western powers on the kind of advice they give to Nigerian leaders.

A young member of the group who called himself Mujahi Abu Nasir while speaking on the group’s activities also said their sympathizers are everywhere in Nigeria but that the group avoid the killing of fellow Nigerians.
Having split off from Boko Haram - the dominant Nigerian extremist group responsible for weekly shootings and bombings — this new group, Ansaru, said it eschews the killing of fellow Nigerians.
The West, which has often regarded the Islamist uprising as a Nigerian domestic issue, has been explicitly put on notice by Ansaru, adding an international dynamic to a conflict that has already cost more than 3,000 lives.

Ansaru is believed to be responsible for the December kidnapping of a French engineer, who is still missing, and for the abduction of an Italian and a Briton, both construction workers, who were later killed by their captors as a rescue attempt began last year.

It is also likely that the group was involved in the February kidnapping of a French family on the Cameroon-Nigeria border. They were released on Friday, under conditions that are unclear, as well as the kidnapping of a German engineer in Kano killed during a rescue effort last year.

“Any white man who is working with them” — meaning “Zionists,” — “we can kidnap them, everywhere,” said Mujahid Abu Nasir.

He had slipped into Nigeria’s capital, Abuja, with a bodyguard, travelling hundreds of miles from Ansaru’s secret headquarters in the north.

He said he had come under the authorization of Ansaru’s leader, Khalid al-Barnawi, who the United States said has close ties to Al Qaeda in the Islamic Maghreb and has designated a global terrorist.
For three hours, with chilling precision, Abu Nasir, in a neatly pressed shirt and polished shoes, laid out Ansaru’s philosophy, after reciting a verse from the Koran promising “hell fire” for nonbelievers saying “opponents would be killed; Al Qaeda sympathizers were everywhere in Nigeria; and Westerners would be kidnapped”.

He said Ansaru had been motivated by Al Qaeda itself, trained by its affiliate in the region — Al Qaeda in the Islamic Maghreb — and was now following in both their footsteps.

Before speaking or touching anything, Abu Nasir carefully put on black gloves and examined a reporter’s pen to make sure there was no camera hidden in it.

He said he was the son of a Nigerian aristocrat, and he spoke Arabic, which he said he had perfected at a university in Khartoum, Sudan. He understood English perfectly but would not speak it, on principle.

“By taking these hostages, we are sending a message that they should be careful about giving bad advice to our leaders,” he said of Nigeria’s government, which he called a “puppet” of the West.
“They are as dangerous as Al Qaeda,” said Maikaramba Sadiq of Nigeria’s Civil Liberties Organization. “They have the same training as Al Qaeda. They have the same approach as Al Qaeda.”

Still, the two militant groups, Ansaru and Boko Haram, retain ties. “They are with us now,” Abu Nasir said. “Whenever we hear of oppression, we do operations together.”

At the slightest hint of rescue, mistaken or otherwise, Ansaru appears ready to kill its hostages.
Abu Nasir spoke of his early recruitment by Al Qaeda, rigorous training in Al Qaeda in the Islamic Maghreb’s desert camps, his leaders’ contacts with Osama bin Laden and the current leader of Al Qaeda, Ayman al-Zawahri, and disagreements with Boko Haram’s indiscriminate methods.

He said he had attended an Islamic college in the northern metropolis of Kano, which has since become a hotbed of Boko Haram radicalism. Then, “for the zeal of seeking knowledge,” he went to Khartoum, he said, where it was “Al Qaeda propagators who initiated me into the clique.”

The recruiters took him to the southern deserts of Algeria and then to Mauritania for a rigorous training course by Al Qaeda in the Islamic Maghreb. For six months, he said, he trained directly under Abu Zeid. Of five who came with him from Sudan, he said, two died during training.

“Everything the security forces get, we get double that,” he said of Ansaru’s training regimen.
Returning to Nigeria in 2008, Abu Nasir said, he went underground in Lagos. “Thousands” are like him, he said, “some who work in government, some businessmen, some teachers.”

“Any leader who does not listen to the warnings of his people, he is going to pay a heavy price,” Abu Nasir said. “We are not going to take one step back.”

Thursday, April 25, 2013

Tweet Of The Day - Suicide

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Tweet Of The Day - Suicide
The Rate And Ease At Which White People Resort To Suicide Over Issues Amazes Me, If They Lived In The Nigerian Environment, I Wonder How Many Will Still Be Alive.

Sexual Abuse: Pastor In Court For Defiling A Minor

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sexual abuse photo: Trapped: Sexual Abuse imagesCA8QOLQM.jpg

An Omu-Aran Upper Area Court, Kwara, on Thursday admitted a cleric, Kunle Odafe, to N50,000 bail with two sureties in like sum for allegedly defiling a minor.

Odafe, 31, a pastor who lives at Obagunke Area, Omu-Aran, had earlier been refused bail on his arraignment on April 12 on a one-count charge of gross indecent act to which he had pleaded guilty.
He was ordered to be remanded in Omu-Aran Medium Prison by the Judge Fagbemi Adeyemi for the police to conclude their investigation.

Adeyemi said the pastor’s action constituted a nuisance to the society, adding that Odafe ought to be an exemplary leader and a role model.

“How on earth will you involve yourself in such an ignoble act of defiling a girl whose life you are expected to shape?

“You are hereby remanded in prison for the police to conclude their investigation.”

Ruling on the bail application, Adeyemi said he reconsidered Odafe for bail because he was a first offender and did not waste the time of the court.

“The case of indecent act, especially when it involves a minor, is not ordinarily a bailable offence under the Penal Code.

“I granting you bail because you did not waste the time of the court and also as a first offender.
“You should therefore change your attitude for the better,” Adeyemi said.

He adjourned the case till May 7 for sentencing.

Earlier, the prosecutor, Insp. Fabiyi Abiodun, had told the court that Odafe, attached to St. Moses Orimolade C&S Movement Church, Omu-Aran, committed the act between April 2 and April 9.
He said one Olajide of Obagunke Area, Omu-Aran, had on April 3 reported that a 12-year-old girl was missing.

Abiodun said police investigation led to the discovery of the girl in the custody of Odafe, who also confessed to have had unlawful carnal knowledge in contravention of Section 285 of the Penal Code.
The prosecutor urged the court to remand the accused in prison pending the conclusion of investigation into the case.

“The uncooperative attitude of the accused could jeopardise police investigation if granted bail,” he had said.

NAN

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Revealed: US Wars In Iraq And Afghanistan Motivated The Tsarnaev Brothers

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Boston Marathon bombing suspect Dzhokhar Tsarnaev has started talking, and he said some interesting things. He informed investigators that he and his brother were not directed by a foreign terrorist organization. Instead, they were “self-radicalized” and motivated to kill, in part, by U.S. wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, the Washington Post reported.

The 19-year-old also acknowledged his role in the attack while being questioned by investigators in his hospital bed, the report said. Tsarnaev, who has a gunshot wound to the throat and was sedated, responded in writing. He also suffered gunshot wounds in the head, neck, legs and hand during a late-night shootout in Watertown, Mass.

Meanwhile, Tsarnaev's condition is improving, the FBI said on Tuesday. The college student, who had been listed in serious condition at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center since his capture on Friday, is now in fair condition, the bureau said.

The update comes a day after Tsarnaev was charged with two federal counts of using a weapon of mass destruction to kill, injure and cause widespread damage at the marathon. Tsarnaev was informed of the charges and read his rights in his hospital room on Monday morning, and placed in the custody the U.S. Marshal Service. If convicted, he could face the death penalty.

Three people were killed and more than 200 others wounded when two powerful homemade bombs exploded near the race’s finish line. Dzhokhar and his 26-year-old brother, Tamerlan Tsarnaev, who was killed by police as the two attempted to avoid capture, are suspected of planting those bombs.

Tamerlan was an ardent reader of jihadist websites and extremist propaganda, U.S. officials told the Associated Press, suggesting the brothers were motivated by an anti-American, radical version of Islam.

Meanwhile, U.S. investigators traveled to southern Russia on Tuesday to speak to the parents of the brothers, a U.S. Embassy official told the news service. Zubeidat Tsarnaeva, the mother of the suspects, and their father, Anzor, are in Dagestan, a predominantly Muslim province in Russia's Caucasus.

After the bombings, Anzor said he believed the brothers were set up and called Dzhokhar a "true angel." Maret Tsarnaeva, the brothers' aunt, who lives in Toronto, also said she believes her nephews were framed.

Family members are not the only ones expressing doubt. Many Twitter users have been expressing support for Dzhokhar using the hashtag #freejahar. And just like the conspiracy theorists who claimed last week that the Boston Marathon attacks were staged, the support for Dzhokhar has been fervent despite his reported confession.

More on Yahoo



5 Killer Things Not To Say At Work

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 5 Killer Things Not To Say At Work
Be very wary of what you say to others in the office, it may be your undoing. Saying certain thing at work can give others the wrong idea about you and your motives, so be aware of how your words come across to others. Here are five career killers.

"It's all your fault."
This one is fairly obvious -- direct blame never looks good. "What people are saying is 'I've got to cover my rear end,'" says Barb Krantz Taylor, principal consultant at The Bailey Group in Minneapolis. And that can make you look insecure, reluctant to take responsibility, or even a tyrant. "Leaders need self-management, and if I feel angry, I need to find ways to deal with it," Taylor says. Lashing out and blaming others not only doesn't solve the problem at hand, it wrecks business relationships and can seriously hurt your career. Instead, focus on solving the problem and then, when things are quieter, finding out how to prevent it from happening again.

"It's all my fault."
This seems like it could be helpful, but Taylor warns that it's not. "Falling on your sword brings you into a place of shame," she says. Being the martyr and taking everything on yourself can set you up for future blame, as well as plant the impression that you are incompetent. Accept the responsibility for things only if that responsibility is truly yours. "You can apologize for a situation that someone is in," Taylor says, adding that doing so can be effective in moving the focus away from who's at fault and onto finding solutions.

"It's not fair."
Whether this is true or not, this is one of the most unhelpful things you can say at work. No matter how you say it, it's going to come across as whining. And the answer you're likely to get can be something along the lines of "You're right -- so what?" Instead, find more concrete, fact-based objections to something you want to change, rather than relying on emotional appeal.

"That's not my job."
In today's work environment, employees are often asked to go above and beyond as a matter of routine. "That's not my job" can make you look stubborn, lazy and generally uninterested in the company's success. Instead, identify the problem you have with the task at hand -- is it something you truly don't have time for? Is it something that someone else would do better? In addition, Taylor recommends seeing things from the other person's perspective. "If we can be curious about expectations, we can better manage relationships we have with people," she says. There are instances where a jurisdictional or work agreement may make something truly not your job, but if this is not the case, find a better way to turn down extra projects.

"Don't tell so-and-so, but..."
Office politics can be devastating. While you may be involved in closed-door meetings with colleagues or managers, don't say anything in private at work that you wouldn't want said in public at work. No matter how you think you can manage secrets, words often have a way of getting around. Be prudent about what you share and whom you share it with. Watching your words is an important part of your workday life. Think twice before you say something, and try to imagine how your words sound to others.

Yahoo

Picture: MTN Plus Etisalat Advert Wars Equals Rich SAKA

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Picture: MTN Plus Etisalat Advert Wars Equals Rich SAKA
This is probably a response from Etisalat to MTN I Don Port commercial featuring SAKA lol! All I want is best network at lowest cost possible. I have grabbed my popcorn, let the advert war continue.

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Revealed: Photos Of Police Shootout With Suspected Boston Bombers (Tsarnaev Brothers)

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Photos emerge of police shootout with suspected Boston bombers

Revealed: Photos Of Police Shootout With Suspected Boston Bombers (Tsarnaev Brothers)
Photos of the police shootout with the  Boston bomb suspects have emerged. A Watertown resident took photos of the dramatic shootout between policemen and suspected Boston bombers, brothers Tamerlan and Dzhokhar Tsarnaev in the early hours of Friday April 19th. The photos have just been released to the media

The photo above shows the brothers hiding behind a car as they engage in a dramatic shootout with police.

Revealed: Photos Of Police Shootout With Suspected Boston Bombers (Tsarnaev Brothers)
 The resident who took the photographs with his phone from a third-floor bedroom overlooking the scene, said the men ran to the green sedan, left, for more supplies such as explosives.

Revealed: Photos Of Police Shootout With Suspected Boston Bombers (Tsarnaev Brothers)
In another image, a red circle shows what the eyewitness believed to be a pressure cooker bomb
Revealed: Photos Of Police Shootout With Suspected Boston Bombers (Tsarnaev Brothers)
 After detonating the bomb and filling the street with smoke, the youngest brother jumped in the car and ploughed towards the police officers lining the end of the residential street
Revealed: Photos Of Police Shootout With Suspected Boston Bombers (Tsarnaev Brothers)
As he drove the car, his older brother was taken down by police. His body is circled
Revealed: Photos Of Police Shootout With Suspected Boston Bombers (Tsarnaev Brothers)
When the gun battle was over, police rushed to where the green sedan was parked and announced there were other devices on the street, sparking a search
Revealed: Photos Of Police Shootout With Suspected Boston Bombers (Tsarnaev Brothers)
This image shows a blast mark on the ground from where the pressure cooker bomb exploded
Revealed: Photos Of Police Shootout With Suspected Boston Bombers (Tsarnaev Brothers)
As daylight broke, the witness took photos of the abandoned sedan and backpacks
Revealed: Photos Of Police Shootout With Suspected Boston Bombers (Tsarnaev Brothers)
Police swarm the street to check all the houses. The witness' home was then evacuated
Daily Mail UK

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