Picture of the Day: Classic Marriage Proposal

Picture of the Day: Classic Marriage Proposal

Now that's what I call a marriage proposal. He said yes to the smell of your poopoo, you should at least say yes to his engagement ring lol.

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10 Ways To Avoid Marrying Wrong Person

1) Do Not Marry Potential:
Oftentimes men consider marrying a woman hoping she never changes while a woman considers marrying a man she hopes she can change.  This is the wrong approach on both accounts.  Don’t assume that you can change a person after you’re married to them or that they will reach their potential.  There is no guarantee, after all, that those changes will be for the better. In fact, it’s often for the worse. If you can’t accept someone or imagine living with them as they are then don’t marry them.  These differences can include a number of things such as ideological or practical differences in religion, habits, hygiene, communication skills, etc.

2) Choose Character over Chemistry:  
While chemistry and attraction are no doubt important, character precedes them both. A famous quote follows, “Chemistry ignites the fire, but character keeps it burning.” The idea of falling “in love” should never be the sole reason for marrying someone; it is very easy to confuse infatuation and lust for love.  The most important character traits to look for include humility, kindness, responsibility, & happiness. Here’s a breakdown of each trait:

Humility: The humble person never makes demands of people but rather always does right by them. They put their values and principles above convenience and comfort.  They are slow to anger, are modest, and avoid materialism.

Kindness: The kind person is the quintessential giver. They seek to please and minimize the pain of others. To know if a person is a giver, observe how they treat their family, siblings, and parents. Do they have gratitude towards their parents for all that they’ve done for them? If not, then know that they will never appreciate what you do for them. How do they treat people they don’t have to be kind towards (i.e. waiters, sales associates, employees, etc)? How do they spend their money?  How do they deal with anger; their own anger and their reaction to someone else’s anger?

Responsibility: A responsible person has stability in their finances, relationships, job, and character.  You can you rely on this person and trust what they say.

Happiness: A happy person is content with their portion in life. They feel good about themselves and good about their life. They focus on what they have rather than on what they don’t have.  They very rarely complain.


3) Do Not Neglect The  Emotional Needs of Your Partner:
Both men and women have emotional needs and in order for a partnership to be successful those needs must be mutually met. The fundamental emotional need of a woman is to be loved.  The fundamental emotional need of a man is to be respected and appreciated.  To make a woman feel loved give her the three AAAs:  Attention, Affection, & Appreciation.  To make a man feel loved give him the three RRRs:  Respect, Reassurance, & Relief.

It is the obligation of each partner to make sure the other is happy and this extends to intimacy as well. As long as each partner is fulfilled by the emotional needs of the other, the intimate relationship will thrive.  When a man takes seriously the emotional needs of his wife she will feel more encouraged to fulfill his intimate desires. Likewise, when a woman takes seriously the emotional needs of her husband he will feel more encouraged to give her the affection, love and appreciation she wants from him. Working together in this way encourages both giving and receiving.

4) Avoid Opposing Life Plans:
In marriage you can either grow together or grow apart. Sharing a common purpose in life will increase the chance that you will grow together.

You must know what the person is into. In other words, what are they ultimately passionate about?  Then ask yourself,

“Do I respect this passion?” “Do I respect what they are into?”
The more specifically you define yourself, i.e., your values, your beliefs, your lifestyle, the better chance you have of finding your life partner, your soul mate, the one you are most compatible with.
Remember, before you decide who to take along on a trip, you should first figure out your destination.

5) Avoid Pre-Marital intimate/Physical Activity:
Recognize that there is incredible wisdom in why God has ordered us to refrain from intimacy before marriage; they are to prevent great harms as well as to keep sacred what is the most blessed part of a relationship between a man and a woman.

Aside from the obvious spiritual consequences, when a relationship gets physical before its time, important issues like character, life philosophy, and compatibility go to the wayside. Consequently, everything is romanticized and it becomes difficult to even remember the important issues let alone talk about them.
Intellectual commitment must be established before emotional or intimate commitment.

6) Avoid Lack of Emotional Connection:
There are four questions that you must answer YES to:

Do I respect and admire this person?  What specifically do I respect and admire about this person?
Do I trust this person?  Can I rely on them?  Do I trust their judgment?  Do I trust their word? Can I believe what they say?
Do I feel Safe?  Do I feel emotionally safe with this person?  Can I be vulnerable?  Can I be myself?  Can I be open?  Can I express myself?
Do I feel calm and at peace with this person?
If the answer is “I don’t know, I’m not sure, etc.” keep evaluating until you know for sure and truly understand how you feel. If you don’t feel safe now, you won’t feel safe when you are married.  If you don’t trust now, this won’t change when you are married!

7) Pay Attention to Your Own Emotional Anxiety:
Choosing someone you don’t feel safe with emotionally is not a good recipe for a long-lasting and loving marriage.  Feeling emotionally safe is the foundation of a strong and healthy marriage.  When you don’t feel safe, you can’t express your feelings and opinions.  Learn how to identify whether you are in an abusive relationship.  If you feel you always have to monitor what you say, if you are with someone and you feel you can’t really express yourself and are always walking on eggshells, then it’s very likely you are in an abusive relationship.  Look for the following things:

Controlling behavior: This includes controlling the way you act, the way you think, the way you dress, the way you wear your hair/hijab and the way you spend your time.  Know the difference between suggestions and demands.  Demands are an expression of control and if the demands are implied, than you must do it or there will be consequences. All of these are clear indications of abusive personalities.

Anger issues:  This is someone who raises their voice on a regular basis, who is angry, gets angry at you, uses anger against you, uses put downs, and curses at you, etc.  You don’t have to put up with this type of treatment.  Many people who tolerate this behavior usually come from abusive backgrounds.  If this is the case with you or someone you know, get help right away.  Deal with those issues before getting married or before even thinking about getting married.

8) Beware of Lack of Openness In Your Partner:
Many couples make the mistake of not putting everything on the table for discussion from the onset.  Ask yourself, “What do I need to know to be absolutely certain I want to marry this person?” “What bothers me about this person or the relationship?”  It’s very important to identify what’s bothering you, things that concern you, and things you are afraid to bring up for discussion. Then you must have an honest discussion about them. This is a great way to test the strength of your relationship. Bringing up issues when there’s conflict is a great opportunity to really evaluate how well you communicate, negotiate, and work together as a team.  When people get into power struggles and blame each other, it’s an indication they don’t work well as a team.  Also important is being vulnerable around each other. Ask deep questions of each other and see how your partner responds.  How do they handle it?  Are they defensive?  Do they attack?  Do they withdraw?  Do they get annoyed?  Do they blame you?  Do they ignore it?  Do they hide or rationalize it?  Don’t just listen to what they say but watch for how they say it!

9) Beware of Avoiding Personal Responsibility:
It’s very important to remember no one else is responsible for your happiness. Many people make the mistake of thinking someone else will fulfill them and make their life better and that’s their reason for getting married.  People fail to realize that if they are unhappy as a single person, they will continue to be miserable when they are married.  If you are currently not happy with yourself, don’t like yourself, don’t like the direction your life is going now, it’s important to take responsibility for that now and work on improving those areas of your life before considering marriage.  Don’t bring these issues into your marriage and hope your partner will fix them.

10) Watch Out For Lack of Emotional Health and Availability In Your Potential Partner: 
Many people choose partners that are not emotionally healthy or available. One huge problem is when a partner is unable to balance the emotional ties to family members, the marriage ends up having 3 (or more) people in it rather than two. An example of this would be if a man is overly dependent on his mother and brings that relationship into the marriage; this is no doubt a recipe for disaster.  Also important to consider are the following:

Avoid people who are emotionally empty inside.  These include people who don’t like themselves because they lack the ability to be emotionally available. They are always preoccupied with their deficiencies, insecurities, and negative thoughts.  They are in a perpetual fight with depression, never feel good, are isolated, are critical and judgmental; tend to not have any close friends, and often distrust people or are afraid of them.  Another clear indication about them is they always feel their needs are not getting met; they have a sense of entitlement and feel angry when they feel people should take care of them and they don’t.

They feel burdened by other people’s needs and feel resentment towards them.  These people can not be emotionally available to build healthy relationships.
Addictions can also limit the level of availability of the partner to build a strong emotional relationship.  Never marry an addict.  Addictions are not limited to drugs and alcohol.  They can be about addictions and dependency on work, internet, hobbies, sports, shopping, money, power, status, materialism, etc.  When someone has an addiction, they will not and can not be emotionally available to develop an intimate relationship with you!

Additional Points to Consider:

The fact is no one looks 25 forever.  Ultimately, we love the person we marry for more than their appearance.  When we get to know someone we love and admire, we’ll love them for their inner beauty and overall essence.

Once we find someone, we consciously or subconsciously want so badly for it all to work that we decide not to question or see what is clearly in front of our eyes: they were rude to the waiter, speaks ill of others, is rude to you, etc.  We don’t stop to ask, “What does all of this mean about their character?”
Never separate someone from their family, background, education, belief system, etc.  Asking clear questions can clarify this.  Ask questions like, “What does it mean to have a simple lifestyle?” “What are your expectations of marriage?”  “How would you help around the house?” Compare your definition with theirs.

Be flexible.  Be open-minded!
Giving in a happy marriage should not be confused with martyrdom.  It should be about taking pleasure and seeing the other person as happy because of your connection with them.
Morality and spirituality are the qualities that truly define someone in addition to beauty, money, and health.  The morally upright and spiritual person will stand by your side during adversity and hardship.  If someone isn’t God-conscience and doesn’t take themselves into account with God then why should you expect them to fulfill their rights owed to you?

The ideal partner is someone who considers giving a gain and not causing a loss.  Having a mutual and shared spiritual relationship will foster a successful marriage.  Furthermore, a successful marriage is one that keeps the laws of family purity which require a certain degree of self-control and self-discipline, as well as the belief that the physical side of the relationship includes the spiritual and emotional side as well.  Finding commonality and balance between the spiritual and emotional aspects of a relationship is a strong key to a healthy and thriving marriage.

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What's The Right Way To Break Up

I’m breaking up with you, DIG IN

Everything, good or bad or whatever must come to an end. From that blistering hot affair to your slow burn relationship of 5 years. End, end, end. Call it what you will. I call it pragmatism.

All philosophy talk aside, what do you do when the relationship has become staid?

You walk. Like a man.

A man knows when it is time to cut losses and move the fvck on. You should too.

Grab your balls, man. Tell her. Don’t tell her friends, your friends, their friends. No. Tell her. It wasn’t working. Goodbye.

Make sure you’re armed with a cogent reason.

Saying that “It’s wasn’t you, It’s me” is just total bollocks and you should be shot in the end if you come up with a lazy reason like that.

Yes, the argument is this, that you’re a man and you do not owe any one an explanation. This is true. However, they way women are wired, if the mitigating circumstances are not good enough for her, she will build a castle out of a pile of turd. Control the narrative. This is not to say she won’t make up her own reasons and tell her girlfriends you couldn’t get it up and you had STDs. No. But at least, it will give her something to chew on while she searches for the all elusive closure. Oh and by the way, even if she’s a bitch, don’t tell her that. God, no. Focus on telling her what wasn’t working.

FOR GODSSAKES, DO NOT SEND HER A DAMNED TEXT MESSAGE.

OR AN EMAIL

 

OR A LETTER.

OR WHATEVER.

DO IT IN PERSON. Yes, she may lash out and curse your generations for daring to leave her. Big deal. You’ll be fine. But do it in person. You may drown in her river of tears, wear a floater. But do it in person.

Kanye’s Ex before Amber Rose broke up with him via Text Message, look what happened to his Hip-Hop. We haven’t heard from Kanye since the Graduation. *Dropout bear tears*

LEAVE.

Motherf0cker, leave. For the immediate period after the break up. Make yourself scarce for goodness sakes. Stop taking her calls, replying her emails and all that good stuff. She will thank you. She will hate you for it at first, but she’ll thank you. You were her drug. You best be giving her rehab COLD TURKEY.

On a lighter note, 10 points to this guy for creativity:

I’m breaking up with you, DIG IN

Peace. Peas and Piss.

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How Good Are You In Bed?

How good are you in bed? Im sure most people will say a deafening VERY GOOD! Well take this little test to find out by answering just 10 questions.

Follow the link Chacha

Post your score here afterwards, no cheating lol.

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South African Woman Stabs Her Nigerian Husband To Death

 

Nigerian man, Tony Rholand  (pictured above on the right) was stabbed to death by his South African wife, Lungi, at their home in Willims town, Cape Town, South Africa on Tuesday January 1st.

The couple, who have a kid together, got into an argument in the early hours of January 1st and before anyone could stop it, Lungi stabbed Tony severally in the stomach. Tony died in the hospital a few hours later. Lungi has been arrested.

This is so sad.

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Pastor Adeoye Set to Wed Tuface's Baby Mama, Sunmbo Ajaba

Love is where you find it. And this pastor has found it in one of Tuface's baby mamas.

Pastor Adeoye is one of the new generational pastors doing so well. He is the General Overseer of Royalty Christian Centre. While Sunmbo Ajaba is one of Tuface's babymamas and also the CEO of ESOB Events. Sunmbo is one of the choristers in his church. Pastor Adeoye lost his wife over a year ago and the wedding will take place this year. Big congrats to the couple.

Now, if you enjoyed this article I’d like you to do two things for me. I’ll really appreciate it!

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Iyanya And Yvonne Nelson Back Together

Rhipplemedia gathered from sources close to the couple that they are somehow back together and seriously working on their relationship. Yvonne and Iyanya had a heart to heart talk while Iyanya was in Ghana over the holidays. The Ghanaian actress was later seen dropping Iyanya off at the airport in her car.

The sexy stars started dating in July 2012 but ended their relationship in November after Yvonne accused the Kukere crooner of cheating on her with another actress.

"They are talking on the phone everyday but things are not entirely in place as Yvonne's friends are advising her not to go back to him because of how much he hurt her the last time' The source revealed to me.

Iyanya currently has Yvonne Nelson's photo as his display picture on his BB. (As seen above...taken 8:51 this evening).

Now, if you enjoyed this article I’d like you to do two things for me. I’ll really appreciate it!

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Confirmed! Kim Kardashian Is Pregnant

According to MediaTakeOut.com report, night that a physician visited Kim Kardashian at her home to treat her for a bout of what's being described as "acute morning sickness".
If this is true....then this new power couple and publicity freaks will be saying I do soon, unless there's a funny twist to it.

Now, if you enjoyed this article I’d like you to do two things for me. I’ll really appreciate it!

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KIMYE Prepare To Spend Xmas Together

 

The new publicity crazy, power couple Kanye and Kim K will be spending their very first Christmas together as the rapper has agreed to join the Kardashians at their home in Los Angeles for this celebration

Now, if you enjoyed this article I’d like you to do two things for me. I’ll really appreciate it!

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Ace Comedian AY Buys Wife Brand New 2012 Acura ZDX

Comedy money is speaking. It's a brand new 2012 advanced package Acura ZDX. Meanwhile, word has it that the couple will be moving into their own Lekki home in January 2013.

 

 

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Help With Tips On Our Wedding Night For A 24-Year Old Virgin Woman Getting Marrried To A 32 Year-Old Virgin Man

Good Afternoon
Hope you're having a good day.

My name is Nkem, a student and a blogger.  I'm a regular reader of your blog.
I kinda need some advice from your readers...
I'm sending this to you because I want as many opinions/ advice as possible.

I'm 24 years old, engaged to a 32 year old guy and both of us are virgins.
Before our engagement, we dated for over a year, and we have no plans of having sex before we get married.

We're getting married few months from now, and I think I'm a bit scared of the pain I'll feel on the wedding night, during our first sex.
The question is, 'Are there tips, hints, or techniques we can employ to reduce/ eliminate the pain and probably make our first sex experience enjoyable rather than painful?'

Please, this is not fiction, it's real... Help me beg your readers not to insult me.
Thank you very much.
God bless you.

Now, if you enjoyed this article I’d like you to do two things for me. I’ll really appreciate it!

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Photo: World’s Tallest Teen Girl and Her Boyfriend

Now thats some serious height and the difference is clear lol.  6ft 8in Elisany da Cruz Silva is 17 and her boyfriend is 22. They recently went for a romantic walk on the beach.

The image that pops into my head when I look at them is a giraffe and an antelope. Imagine her hip is almost up to his shoulder! Damn!!!

Now, if you enjoyed this article I’d like you to do two things for me. I’ll really appreciate it!

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